Baby Driver


Overall score: 99.9% + 200% + 7000000%

Best parts: Ok! This movie was AMAZING! The best word to describe Baby Driver is that it is SO smooth. Every single line, sound effect, special effect, and interaction was impeccably placed and well thought out. The entire movie was rhythmic and the mixing of the sound effects with music was pure freaking genius. I just want to cuss I loved it so much.

Worst things: Some idiot fell asleep during the movie(how?! It was so intense!) and started to snore. It was so loud I got distracted and missed a line. I will never get that moment back. Next time you feel like being an a-hole and snore during the best movie of 2017, don’t.

Parental guidance: yea, don’t take your kids. Lots of crime, blood, murder, stealing stuff. There’s no sex though, so there’s that.

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Book of Henry


Overall score: 51%

Best things: Naomi Watts once again plays a frazzled, immature, single mother, and does a pretty good job. 

Worst things: The movie had kind of dumb concept. To make matters worse, the ending made the dumb concept almost pointless because it didn’t matter in the end. It wasn’t a terrible movie but eh. 

Parental advisory: There were a lot of swear words. Child abuse. Plot to murder. Maybe don’t bring your kids. 

It’s SUNDAY!


Guys! I’ve been sitting on my butt all day, painting nails and watching Wayne’s World, and then I thought, man, I sure would like to go to the movies. Don’t you want to go too?! 

Follow my blog, thecriticgirl.com if you’re reading this you’re on it, the FOLLOW IT! Easy! If you follow it, you will be entered to win two movie tickets!! 

SHWING!

All Eyes on Me (a.k.a. The boring Straight out of Compton)

Overall rating: 69% (reminder: all things rated 69% are just, meh)

Best things: Um, I forgot? I just saw this last night! I guess the guy who played 2Pac looked like him…

Ok the story was cool, I didn’t know anything about Tupac before and now I do!

Worst things: The movie wasn’t horrible, but it wasn’t great. There wasn’t anything super dumb or terrible, I just got kind of bored. EEK, sorry movie!

Parental Guidance: This is rated R for some boobies, lots of people saying fu@& and other “sentence enhancers.” Don’t bring your kids even if they are adults. That would just be plain awkward!!!

The Mummy – Dark Universe


This was not just another Brendon Frazier remake of weird sand creatures. This was something must bigger and much more expansive. The Mummy was a perfect intro to the dark universe stories paving a perfect path to their debuts. 

Overall score: 76%
Best things: great acting. The Mummy was perfectly creepy. There were plenty of comic relief moments that are actually funny. Tom Cruz is SO good. 

Worst things: You’d think this list would be long due to stupid Rotten Tomatoes striking again on their unwarranted bad reviews, but other than it being a tiny cheesy this movie was awesome. 

Parental advisory: intense characters and makeup. Some zombie stuff. I wouldn’t take my 6 year old but I would take some 12 year olds. 

Wonder Woman


I’m baaaaaaaack! Gosh I’ve been a super loser about writing reviews. I forgot my wordpress password and I just got super lazy about resetting it! Anyway, review time.

Overall score: 100%

Best things: ok freaking Wonder Woman is my new movie crush. (Sorry Jake Gyllenhal) Her fights scenes were the best I’ve ever seen in my entire life. There was a certain scene, set in a war setting, won’t give away too much, but I might have shed a tear I was so inspired.

Worst things: Well guys, sorry to burst your bubble but Chris Pine is not Captian America and nor will he ever become Captain America. Soo, don’t wait the entire movie for him to turn into Captain America.

There are no parental advisorys on this movie. I took my 6 year old and she now wants to be a crime fighting super hero, so yea. Take your kids.

The Shallows


Overall score: 32%

Best part of the movie: The shark was an amazing actor!!

Worst part of the movie: Forced dialogue. Yuck! For some reason when Blake Lively said, “is there anything gnarly out there,” it just made it way too awkward to watch her keep saying stuff after that. Less talking more sharks eating people I always say. 

Parental advisory: One F word. Lots of butt cheeks in swimsuits. (Cute butt cheeks though) and gore…obviously