Solo: A Star Wars Story

Overall Score: 94%

First of all, why is everyone saying this was a bad movie? Is it cause you want to sound cool? Just let go of your pride and accept that Alden Ehrenreich has a better jaw line than you and that smirk made your heart melt. I seriously reached into my no bias brain for this review and I actually thought it was the perfect addition to the Star Wars Story and was an awesome homage to Han Solo.

Best things: Han Solo has a big personality and a huge presence in Star Wars. Harrison Ford created the perfect character through intense charm, charisma, and mannerisms. Alden had some rather large shoes to fill, and he did amazing. He really captured Han’s pre jaded, bright eyed, and eager self. We were introduced to more of his character development and I think that was just NEATO.

Don’t hate me, but Lando is just a whatever character to me. Has been since I was wee lad. But I kind of like him better after this movie! I thought Donald Glover did awesome!

Also, who saw that part with Darth Maul coming!!!!??? Haha cooooool. If you thought this part was dumb, then YOU’RE dumb!!! Please do your research on Star Wars Rebels, and Darth Maul; the ultimate Sith Lord.

Things I didn’t like: ok, so after learning about some production issues with the movie, the first part didn’t seem to flow as nicely to me (ignorance is bliss). Emilia Clark either went through a drastic character change, we never really knew her at all, or she suddenly went from more of a cockney accent to a proper English accent. I feel like this should have been addressed. Like Han says, “you’ve changed,” and Emilia says, “oh yeah my accent is different because…” I clearly should write scripts.

This was just a cool movie. See it with the same excitement you used to watch Star Wars with and stop picking them apart for crying out loud.

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Dead Pool: 2

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Overall Score: 80%

Best Parts of the Movie: I thought this was an excellent example of team work, determination, and not giving up even though we are depressed. I was really inspired to do good after watching this. I thought the cameos were perfectly subtle, and I got a really cute reminder about the first intro to dead pool in The Wolverine! Just a fun little memory. This is a super cute, and very family friendly movie. Please, take your young children! They will love it. ❤

Worst Parts: well, it was funny, creative, and sentimental. I thought it was great. No complaints here.

Additional Comments: The humor was similar to the first one but I kind live for shock value and there was PLENTLY of that so it didn’t feel repetitious to me. The story developed well off the 1rst one.

Parental Advisory: Bad Word Count: 1,300,600 Gore Moments: 7,999 Sexual Inuendos: A Lot. Overall, great for kids and families

Who is Rey?


Many have asked for my speculation on who Rey is and theories on her family lineage. I spent a whole 10 minutes contemplating the possibility that she is Luke’s illegitimate child, Ben’s, somehow, grandchild(parents unknown) or a natural phenomenon in the force recreating balance.

Here is my actual theory.

Guys, I just don’t care who she is or where she came from right now. I’m just excited for the dramatic reveal in the movie. One day, all you nerds will get the truth and then you can finally sleep at night. So everyone stop asking me who she is, cause I don’t care and neither should you.

Demolition

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Overall Score: 100%

Best part of the movie: The script was genius, Jake was perfect (I want to be on him), the story was so relatable and real, and there were 0 cliches. Pure perfection. A true testament of great writing and originality. Well done.

Worst part of the movie: Isn’t Jake Gyllenhaal supposed to come out of the screen and stroke my hair or something? That didn’t happen, soooo…. Yea. Pretty sucky.

Have you ever gone through life completely disconnected? It’s almost like you want to care about certain things but you just can’t. Jake Gyllenhaal’s subtle acting perfectly embodied what it is to be numb. When you think the story was going to go one way, comic relief saved it from an overused cliche that often ruins movies. See this. NOW NOW NOW!!

BATMAN v SUPERMAN:Dawn of Justice

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****THIS REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS****

Overall Score: 91 %

Best part of the movie: 1. Great acting 2. Engaging plot 3. Very believably creepy villain 4. Very effective tie ins from other Batman and Superman stories. (These were a bit low key at times, but if you could pick them out, they were extremely nostalgic and funny)

Worst part of the movie: During the developing relationship of Batman, Superman and Luther, I got bit bored. I think I zoned out a few times and I was really nervous other people could hear me chewing my popcorn. Usually, if I do this during a movie, that part lacked “move magic.”

Okay, this movie was COOL. It really captured a humanistic approach to super heros that I’ve never seen before. I have never felt like a movie focused on the vulnerabilities of Batman or Superman; touched on them, yes. However, in this case, they seemed real. I felt a real connection to something that was merely a comic that was meant to entertain. See this!

Parental guide: I would say if your child likes action, see it. There is a bathtub scene where Lewis is naaaaakkkeeeed; although it doesn’t show anything, boobies are heavily implied. I would take my 13 year old to see it. Anything younger might be iffy.

 

 

 

 

Allegiant 


Overall score: ok, usually I don’t agree with rotton tomatoes, but I’m going to have to support their solid 9%.

Best part of the movie: All the meant to be serious parts that were actually pretty funny.

Worst part of the movie: All the meant to be serious parts…First off, did they just completely change the entire crew?! Divergent and Insurgent were a bit teen cheese, but not this bad. I still enjoyed them. But this was a heinous crime against film making! Bad camera angles+cliche after cliche+terrible script+horrendous acting=Allegiant.

Sure, go see it; if you’re lonely and desperate for any kind of entertainment. This movie stinks worse than my butthole.

10 Cloverfield Ln


Overall Score: 89%

Best part of the movie: Unexpected twist after unexpected twist! I had no idea what to expect, you should go into the movie with the same expectations. Let’s just say the whole thing was a mind (bad word).

Worst part of the move: I probably had anxiety the whole time. That is partially the reason for the 89%. I personally hate that feeling. But, the fact that it gave me anxiety is a good indicator that the movie was well made. Some people criticized the *****SPOILER***** alien dog thing, that it was a bit cliche. I say, aliens can never be too cliche.

You’re going to want to see this 100%